Victim or Survivor? Living & Healing After Abuse/Violence
This is a tough topic to write on and an even tougher one to make a video about! There’s already a ton of videos and articles out there on this topic so I decided to go about it a little differently. Yes, this might sound harsh but the point is pretty straightforward: You have to move on. The more you dwell on the past, the less you heal. Healing is about accepting the past and learning to live despite it.
Everything that happens to us in our lifetimes becomes a part of who we are as a whole. Yes, even the bad. It is a part of us and we must accept that before we can move on. That acceptance can be a very painful process but it is part of the healing. Avoiding the pain is avoiding healing. There will be tears. Many, many tears. There will be breakdowns and there will be very dark times to go through in the healing process. It’s NORMAL. It’s NATURAL.
A song I listen to almost exclusively when I am feeling those dark, dreadful feelings is “Forty Six & 2” by Tool. Yeah. It’s dark and it’s heavy and metal and all that but it totally reflects how it feels to heal. It’s all about confronting those dark moments, the dark past, the shadows in our hearts and MOVING THROUGH IT TO THE OTHER SIDE where you can find the light that you need to move on with healing. Give it a listen, even watch a video with lyrics on the screen so you can read more than listen if you don’t like that style of music. It actually helps me, maybe it could help you too. I end up singing it as a mantra during really really hard times… it’s about making choices to go on and get through what you are going through, no matter what.
So, with that in mind, here is the video that I made over the weekend on this topic: