I wrote a rather long response to someone on Facebook today. She was asking about how other people handle hard times, chronic illness and depression, and how to help her Mom with the same problems she is having with feeling depressed. I thought it might be something good to share here, as well…
I have and continue to fight the depression. I just **refuse** to allow it in.
I do have anxiety that kicks my butt sometimes whether I like it or not. LOL. I have too much to keep going
forto let depression in. Sure, I hear it knocking on the door sometimes. I just don’t answer. When the thoughts start, I stop it. I do something… ANYTHING… to keep my mind away from that.
Once it starts, it is harder to get out of that hole so I work hard to not fall in it
tobegin with. What I don’t do is bottle up the emotions and refuse to acknowledge them. That gets you into big trouble further down the road. I know when life is hard, frustrating, sad, angering, and I allow myself to feel it but there’s a fine line between feeling it and working through it and getting stuck in that hopelessness of depression.
There’s ALWAYS hope and I choose to focus on that. If I can’t find it within myself. I look at my kid and my dogs. Seriously. I get a lot of hope and joy from them. I talk to friends. I listen to soothing music or get lost in a crazy movie (nothing sad, usually exciting action movies!).
Yes. It is ridiculously hard.
The tendency to depression is a chemical one in the brain, not just emotional. That is why I focus on physical things that bring joy, or on something highly stimulating like an action movie that triggers the release of other chemicals in the body to override the depression chemicals and I attempt to continue to seek that alternative-chemical release for a while to keep it going until it is easier. Kinda like using an antidepressant but not taking a pill for it.
There’s always SOMETHING that can bring hope but you have to choose to see it and to focus on it instead of other things as much as possible. I had to learn to always find the silver lining, to ALWAYS look at the positive and to force myself to smile through the pain.
Last year, I suffered a loss that was just… ugh. It was horrible. It was so hard to climb out of that hole from it but I did find a
way,and had to also lead my son out of his own hole too. The only way I made it was by finding the good left in life, to find the beauty around me and things that made me smile. Even a little. And then build on that.
Never give up. Never surrender. Even to your own depression. Fight, fight, fight.
You are strong and you can do this! And maybe take your Mom to see Aquaman or something! LOL! Seriously.. those good hormones and chemicals from the action movie will help, even if for a little while, and give you both a chance to start the process of climbing out of your own depression holes.
Jason Momoa in tights helps too 😉 LOL! Hugs to you, sweetie! You are NOT alone and you CAN do this!
Nogo conquer the world 🙂